“The highest achievement of the spiritual life is within the full embrace of the ordinary. Our appetite for the big experience — sudden insight, dazzling vision, heart-stopping ecstasy — is what hides the true way from us.”
Breakfast at the Victory - The Mysticism of Ordinary Experience by James P. Carse
Breakfast at the Victory - The Mysticism of Ordinary Experience by James P. Carse
Monday, October 17, 2011
Caught in the Undertow
My car got towed this morning courtesy of the Carlsbad Police Department. The reason: my auto registration is six months overdue and by law is susceptible to impound. I suspect that I'm not alone in my circumstances.
Six months ago it would have only cost me $60 to register my car. But six months ago I barely had money for food or gas. Now without transportation, I'm unable cash the check that I received yesterday a recent job, unable video that book interview and cooking demonstration next week. I don't know how I'll gather the funds to pay the multiple parking citations to reclaim my car and the late registration fees. All for the lack of a paltry $60.
I could have asked friends for that registration fee, avoiding all of this. But how many times have they already been asked by me or others they know. With other acquaintances in more need than myself, how is it even possible for me to ask?
Too old and overqualified, I've been unemployed for the last 4 years, scrambling for odd jobs and relying on the generosity of friends to make ends meet. When forced to scramble, unfortunate choices have to be made about which bills get paid and which ones don't. Yes, there have been good days, but they have since become fewer.
The begged question asks, "Why doesn't he just get a job?" I wait for an answer to another question: "Why are they unwilling to hire me?" Even a dishwasher position requires 2 years experience. Somehow I've joined ranks of the non-employed: unwanted and uncounted. I've "re-invented myself" and have become an "entrepreneur." But in this economy, who would by my wares and services. Being an entrepreneur today is much akin to being a subsistence farmer or indentured servant. With car impounded, I'm not even that.
I look into my wallet, only to see four dollar bills. My checking account is overdrawn. The cat wants food.
Mine is but an eddy in the worldwide economic undertow that has consumed countless, otherwise unsuspecting people. Those who are able and willing, but are stymied for a reasons beyond their control. We've found ourselves in the wrong place at the wrong time, thrashing to keep our heads above water with no lifeguard in sight. I wonder how many cars like mine got towed today.
This happen to me on two previous occasions under the same circumstances, so I knew that the towing was possibility. I accept by responsibility and the consequences of my choices. The foolish lesson had been learned, but the personal financial difficulties simply could not prevent the additional teaching.
Still, looking at the plight of others around the world, I remain among the lucky ones. What could $60 mean to them?
While ranting to the officer (it was time I get it off of my chest), he kept saying how sorry he was to hear it, how he was just following the law. Lip service? Perhaps. The tow truck operator was just doing his job, wasn't he? Making a living when others cannot. It's all that can be done. All part of the undertow, becoming more and more difficult to escape over time.
Who Are America's Jobless?
UPDATE (11.03.11)
The car is back in my possession and it's registration renewed...but not without some surprises.
Labels:
economic justice,
global economy,
joblessness,
unemployment
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1 comment:
I really understand the difficulties you are facing. I have been going through something very much the same but have been lucky to just get a 6-month consulting job after being unemployed for three years. I truly wish you the best and hope that something positive comes your way soon.
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